boys and girls
I have another posting coming today but I've been trying to figure out how to put that one in words. It's in response to my last few...so more to come on that later...but I HAD to post this cause I LOVE thinking about it!
I have a slight obsession with Pride and Prejudice - I think I may have said this before and I've only been blogging for like a week! I want to be Elizabeth Bennet. She is so beautiful, caring, witty, compassionate, I mean seriously, who wouldn't want to be her? But I think the main reason I really want to be her is because of the way that Mr. Darcy loves her. She has "bewitched him body and soul" and he loves her. Guys, every girl wants to be loved like this, well this girl atleast...
The whole book/movie you think they hate each other - or she atleast can't stand him. Watching it you think he's a jerk, that he has no feelings, but in reality he is so in love with Elizabeth he doesn't really know how to act. But when he figures out how to act he jumps on the oppurtunity to tell her. She totally rejects him because I think she is in shock. There are huge misunderstandings between the two of them and the last thing she thought he was going to tell her was that he loved her. The moment in the movie that she hates him the most he just busts it out. Despite the rejection he continually pursues her - he loves her and he's not afraid to let her know that.
Everytime I read/watch the movie I imagine living in that time period. I think I would love it. The way that men treated the women is sooooooo different than it is now. I think in some ways that is really good, but in other ways I think that now men tend to wuss out a bit. We saw contless examples of the guys in the movie going all out and risking so much for the girl. One guy says to a girl, "I'm going to stay by you for the whole night," guys will claim their love for the women even without the hint of it being reciprocated. Why doesn't that happen now? Why have the times changed so much that it seems to take soooooo much for a guy to risk? I am not putting all guys in this category, because I know some pretty great ones - but that's been my experience for the past few years. And maybe this does still happen more than I think, just not to me!!!
I've been trying to come to grips with this all day. Are women more hurtful now? Can a guys ego not handle any sort of rejection? Are women harder to understand and not as open to relationship? What does it seem like? I feel like it's hard for me to take risks in relationship so I kind of get that it is hard for guys, but I am still a girl. I guess I'm just old fashioned and feel like I should wait to be pursued. But I guess in waiting, I might just have to marry my postman!!! So I'd LOVE comments on the subject. Is it harder for guys to pursue? And why might they not? Or do they still and I'm just missing the boat?!
I have a slight obsession with Pride and Prejudice - I think I may have said this before and I've only been blogging for like a week! I want to be Elizabeth Bennet. She is so beautiful, caring, witty, compassionate, I mean seriously, who wouldn't want to be her? But I think the main reason I really want to be her is because of the way that Mr. Darcy loves her. She has "bewitched him body and soul" and he loves her. Guys, every girl wants to be loved like this, well this girl atleast...
The whole book/movie you think they hate each other - or she atleast can't stand him. Watching it you think he's a jerk, that he has no feelings, but in reality he is so in love with Elizabeth he doesn't really know how to act. But when he figures out how to act he jumps on the oppurtunity to tell her. She totally rejects him because I think she is in shock. There are huge misunderstandings between the two of them and the last thing she thought he was going to tell her was that he loved her. The moment in the movie that she hates him the most he just busts it out. Despite the rejection he continually pursues her - he loves her and he's not afraid to let her know that.
Everytime I read/watch the movie I imagine living in that time period. I think I would love it. The way that men treated the women is sooooooo different than it is now. I think in some ways that is really good, but in other ways I think that now men tend to wuss out a bit. We saw contless examples of the guys in the movie going all out and risking so much for the girl. One guy says to a girl, "I'm going to stay by you for the whole night," guys will claim their love for the women even without the hint of it being reciprocated. Why doesn't that happen now? Why have the times changed so much that it seems to take soooooo much for a guy to risk? I am not putting all guys in this category, because I know some pretty great ones - but that's been my experience for the past few years. And maybe this does still happen more than I think, just not to me!!!
I've been trying to come to grips with this all day. Are women more hurtful now? Can a guys ego not handle any sort of rejection? Are women harder to understand and not as open to relationship? What does it seem like? I feel like it's hard for me to take risks in relationship so I kind of get that it is hard for guys, but I am still a girl. I guess I'm just old fashioned and feel like I should wait to be pursued. But I guess in waiting, I might just have to marry my postman!!! So I'd LOVE comments on the subject. Is it harder for guys to pursue? And why might they not? Or do they still and I'm just missing the boat?!
posted by jmjana @ 8:12 AM
11 Comments:
At 2:42 PM,
ylmurph said…
Jana, you couldn't very well live in that era
because -
1. no cell phones
2. no e-mail
3. no getting in car accidents
Guys don't have to put their necks out there anymore because girls are so aggressive now. The guys had to be the aggressors then and don't now...it's just that simple (I think)
At 2:53 PM,
jmjana said…
oh sean....
a)i could handle the no car accidents
b)how are girls aggressive
At 3:14 PM,
Anonymous said…
I was going to say the same thing as Sean, but then I doubted myself because I thought maybe I have no idea at all and that is why I am still single at 32 :)
Nice to know I'm not that far off (assuming Sean is right on).
At 3:22 PM,
ylmurph said…
there used to be some modicum of modesty with how girls dress...certainly in the age of the movie you love. The girls also didn't ask out guys. The girls weren't nearly as "active"
Go to any dance...and then ask yourself, "I wonder what Sean meant by girls are more aggressive?"
At 4:25 PM,
Kalla said…
I would have to agree with sean that girls are aggressive... we sometimes just don't know it! :)
At 10:15 PM,
Steve Fuller said…
Oh, I have so much to say about this subject, but will bite my tounge for fear of being stoned. :)
By the way, have you ever read "Blue Like Jazz?" Donald Miller's thoughts on Pride & Prejudice are pretty hilarious.
At 12:17 AM,
stef shaffer said…
so jana, i just went and got the movie so i could watch it before reading your post. i understand what you all are saying BUT i tend to believe that these struggles have been the same all throughout history. ive heard a lot discussed about what "the curse" (gen 3:16,17) really is talking about for both men and women and it seems to be beautifully played out over and over in the movie. so my thinking is that it is not about the era of the movie, but about the human condition . thats just my thoughts- i didnt really expain all of that too well, but it would take forever and im tired and this is only a blog comment.
At 8:28 AM,
jmjana said…
oh i love all of you guys SO much...
i think after thinking through this all day i need to reclarify my thoughts
i guess that women are a TON more aggressive than i realized, but i think i may have been jumping the gun on my post because i really wasn't thinking that much outside of myself and my core group of friends - who are extremely nonaggressive. i guess the point that i was trying to make is not that girls aren't aggressive, but that i wish that guys had more guts to just put themselves out there! which some of them do quite well, i just haven't experienced a ton of that since high school!
stef, im so glad that you could watch the movie last night. did you find my fave part? i want to see if you can guess it. i asked annie that and she was like yea, thats everyone's fave part! can't wait to discuss
steve, blue like jazz is one of my all time faves so i feel weird saying that i don't remember the pride and prej part - i dont think i was as into p and p as i am now. i REALLY want to read it now though, but my book is MIA because i gave it to someone and forget who! i'm wondering if this will be the one thing i disagree with miller on!
sean, i love how you will bust my butt until the day you die. its one of my fave things about you and i really am not being sarcastic about that!
At 9:12 AM,
Steve Fuller said…
Donald Miller writes:
"Here's a tip I've never used: I understand you can learn a great deal about girldom by reading 'Pride and Prejudice', and I own a copy, but I have never read it. I tried. It was given to me by a girl with a little note inside that read: 'What is in this book is the heart of a woman.' I am sure the heart of a woman is pure and lovely, but the first chapter of said heart is hopelessly boring. Nobody dies at all. I keep the book on my shelf because girls come into my room, sit on my couch, and eye the books on the adjacent shelf. You have a copy of 'Pride and Prejudice,' they exclaim in a gentle sigh and smile. Yes, I say. Yes, I do."
Beautiful. :)
At 9:32 AM,
jmjana said…
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
At 9:35 AM,
jmjana said…
i just got caught by my kids for reading blogs because i just laughed outloud when they were attempting to be really quiet. that is pretty hilarious. my opinion for all men who claim anything about pride and prej is forever tainted!
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