on relationships...

Tonight I was watching Seinfeld with my bro and Jerry gave me a thought on life that I might not ever forget. Some girl saved his life and they went out and everything was alike about them...they ordered cereal at a restaurant, they have the same initials, same sense of humor, etc., etc. Here was his quote:

"I finally know what I've been looking for my whole life...myself! Im in love with myself! I have swept myself off of my feet!"

That is me. I get excited about guys when they have my same sense of humor, when they like football, when they love Jesus, when they don't care about money or bad driving, when they are laid back and able to engage in interesting conversations. Basically, when they are me in male form.

Sean used to ask me what my "list" was when I was in college. Basically what was essential to me in the guy I want to marry. In college it was, love Jesus, lead Young Life (preferably be on staff, and then on top of that be one of the greats) and then play guitar. Sean would then IN FRONT OF THE GUYS have me rate how they are compared to my list. It was awesome.

I think I'm done with that. I think there is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay more to people than anything that I'll ever know and I just need to stop. I get in a zone in my head where I think this guy can't be prfect for me because he is nothing like me and that's not very fair. It's also not fair that I create who this guy might be in my head...basically who I want him to be. I want to enjoy people for who they are. Period. Who cares if they like bow-hunting? Who cares if they are shy in big groups? Who cares if they dress better than I do? That might be good for me, actually.

I think that I might just be done looking and analyzing. It's way too exhausting and emotionally expensive. Can life just be fun for a little bit and not complicated?