story of my life

So I am subbing today for this teacher that is in charge of the resource room. If people want to get help on a test they come up here and I help them. Pretty easy. I also get to teach like 3 classes which require me pushing a cart around the school - which if any of you know of my driving record, it's about the same as me driving a cart. I think I hit like 6 kids - those things are really hard to control! So yes, I feel like a tool walking through the hall, but whatev, what are you going to do?
So two girls were in here discussing their WEDDING PLANS!!!!!!!! They are JUNIORS IN HIGH SCHOOL!!! What the heck is up with that?!! I just don't get it. Now granted, one of the girls bought her wedding dress at goodwill for $25 (it was originally $50 but she went on half off day). That is not my idea of a dream dress, but I grew up in Hudson - blame it on my environment. Wow that sounded materialistic and snobby. So yea, the one girl is engaged and is waiting for 3 years so she can have a kegger and actually be able to drink it and the other girl is getting married a year from May 19th! May of her SENIOR YEAR! Seriously?
Last night we had club at this girls house who happens to live next to this kid I had in class for like the last 10 days. I pull up to the house and I get out and Lou is smoking his cigs. (He's 15). He exhales and kinda looks at me funny. I just smiled and kept going in the house. Then I was very intrigued because soon his whole little group joined him and they all were smoking and I swear I saw a drug deal. I SOOO badly wanted to be like, hey want to come to club, but I am a wuss, so instead I waved and said hi when we made eye contact again. Loving them where they are at right?
Now I have had two thoughts on these kids.
1) My life was SOOOOOOOO different than theirs. I grew up in white upperclass suburbia where the biggest problem you face is that your shirt from j.crew shrunk, went to Miami University where your biggest problem was that your shirt from j.crew got stretched out. Ok I'm being stupid - people had lots of problems, they are just waaaaaaaay better at hiding them. But I would NEVER have smoked outside my front porch, (I used to have smoke routes I would take so that I wouldn't get caught, but I still got suspended from the vball team. Sweet.) and I would have NEVER smoked in front of my teacher. I think I would have started crying if my teacher saw me! I just want to understand this community I live in SO bad, but I wonder if I ever really can because their lives are SO different than mine.
2) How do we get these kids to a place where they can hear about Jesus. I LOVE Young Life and I have seen it work countless times again and again, but is club really for these kids? Yes they would be welcome but they wouldn't love it. I think that's the point. Club isn't the point. The relationships that we build with these kids and the fact that I get to meet like 100 new ones each time I sub is the greatest. I just want more ways to get inside their world. And I want to not be such a wuss about saying hi to my drug dealing sophomore kid who I really like - he's way up on my list cause he gave me a pizza of their pizza when they ordered it for a party day.
I dont know...
I just really love high school kids. But I think I've got a long way to go before I can get in their world and really go to where they are at.