the net
I need to preface this post.
I LOVE the internet. I love so much about it. I love that I've made AMAZING friends via blogging and emailing. I love that I've gotten to have some great conversations and learn things about me and Jesus by reading peoples thoughts. I love that I get to laugh every day because of Sean and Stef or think everyday because of Dan, Mike, Steve or Wes. I love that I get to email my friend in Australia or England and Katy gets to email me SWEET pics from my bffae Jill MINKE'S wedding! I love that I get to talk on instant messenger to people having great talks at 3am when they are in another country and it costs like 80 cents a minute to talk on the phone or something. So I LOVE so much about it. I am just struggling with parts of it.
I really don't love anonymous posting. I just don't understand it. I don't like that it's an option because it stresses me out on who wrote the comments. This isn't really a problem on mine because people usually put their name to it and if they don't they tell me they posted or I know who it is anyways. But on a lot of other people's blogs they will write really mean comments and not show face. It's just weird to me! The internet allows people to not be real sometimes.
The internet also makes me nervous because I feel like it sets up false realities and sometimes false relationships. It allows us to be lax in real conversation with people because we'll just email it or text it or something. The last few days I've had a few interesting interactions using technology...
1) My dear friend Ashley wrote her boss a note of encouragement. She wanted to let him know the great qualities she saw in him and so she wrote a quick note. He then emailed her back saying thanks so much, you're awesome too, blah blah. Then he felt bad that he just emailed that, so he called, but left a message on her voicemail! They had yet to talk about any of those things in person.
Ashley and I then had this great convo about the sadness of technology. Why didn't they have the conversation face to face? Why is it so hard to share emotion - even good emotion - when you are sitting by the person. I struggle with this so much - its hard for me to express how I feel about a person to their face. And I dont really know why.
2) I had a big run in with a guy who was my supervisor in this random thing. I felt like I got treated pretty poorly and I was really upset about it. Normally, I would just retreat, take the beating and be done. But I'm trying so hard to be confrontational in a healthy way. So I called the guy - but the WHOLE time I was praying that his voicemail would pick up. It did. So I rejoiced and got to email him. Which was probably more coherent and nicer than I would have been on the phone. But he then emailed me back and we had this intensely heated conversation over EMAIL. That just makes me sad. Im at fault and so is he. We both work in ministry - our job is to have significant conversations with people and we can't hash out our hurts face to face or atleast phone to phone. It had to be email. Trust me. I loved the safety behind the computer, but the more I think about it, the more it bothers me because what's it going to be like when I see this guy? Can we say awkward? And I am NOT sean and I don't LOVE the awkward. Its one of my fears!
3) One of my friends, who I love, fights with her boyfriend via texting. I can't think of anything more annoying. I hate typing long texts (even though I think I do it a lot) but I can't imagine trying to convey emotion by texting. Talk about miscommunicating! Whenever she gets upset and Im around, I MAKE her atleast call him because its just ridiculous over text and it takes too much time!
4) I have made GREAT friends, like I said earlier, because of random blogs and commenting, etc. My prayer is that I will be friends with these people when I actually live in the same city as them. I hope so, because it will make me so sad that I can bust out my heart behind a computer screen, but then not when I am sitting across a starbucks table with them! And same for them.
So blog friends that I have met or haven't met, that I have emailed my life to, or just read you through random people's postings, can we be as good of friends in person as we are on the computer? Cause I think you're all pretty great and I just love you alrady...
I think this is the start of something beautiful ;)
I LOVE the internet. I love so much about it. I love that I've made AMAZING friends via blogging and emailing. I love that I've gotten to have some great conversations and learn things about me and Jesus by reading peoples thoughts. I love that I get to laugh every day because of Sean and Stef or think everyday because of Dan, Mike, Steve or Wes. I love that I get to email my friend in Australia or England and Katy gets to email me SWEET pics from my bffae Jill MINKE'S wedding! I love that I get to talk on instant messenger to people having great talks at 3am when they are in another country and it costs like 80 cents a minute to talk on the phone or something. So I LOVE so much about it. I am just struggling with parts of it.
I really don't love anonymous posting. I just don't understand it. I don't like that it's an option because it stresses me out on who wrote the comments. This isn't really a problem on mine because people usually put their name to it and if they don't they tell me they posted or I know who it is anyways. But on a lot of other people's blogs they will write really mean comments and not show face. It's just weird to me! The internet allows people to not be real sometimes.
The internet also makes me nervous because I feel like it sets up false realities and sometimes false relationships. It allows us to be lax in real conversation with people because we'll just email it or text it or something. The last few days I've had a few interesting interactions using technology...
1) My dear friend Ashley wrote her boss a note of encouragement. She wanted to let him know the great qualities she saw in him and so she wrote a quick note. He then emailed her back saying thanks so much, you're awesome too, blah blah. Then he felt bad that he just emailed that, so he called, but left a message on her voicemail! They had yet to talk about any of those things in person.
Ashley and I then had this great convo about the sadness of technology. Why didn't they have the conversation face to face? Why is it so hard to share emotion - even good emotion - when you are sitting by the person. I struggle with this so much - its hard for me to express how I feel about a person to their face. And I dont really know why.
2) I had a big run in with a guy who was my supervisor in this random thing. I felt like I got treated pretty poorly and I was really upset about it. Normally, I would just retreat, take the beating and be done. But I'm trying so hard to be confrontational in a healthy way. So I called the guy - but the WHOLE time I was praying that his voicemail would pick up. It did. So I rejoiced and got to email him. Which was probably more coherent and nicer than I would have been on the phone. But he then emailed me back and we had this intensely heated conversation over EMAIL. That just makes me sad. Im at fault and so is he. We both work in ministry - our job is to have significant conversations with people and we can't hash out our hurts face to face or atleast phone to phone. It had to be email. Trust me. I loved the safety behind the computer, but the more I think about it, the more it bothers me because what's it going to be like when I see this guy? Can we say awkward? And I am NOT sean and I don't LOVE the awkward. Its one of my fears!
3) One of my friends, who I love, fights with her boyfriend via texting. I can't think of anything more annoying. I hate typing long texts (even though I think I do it a lot) but I can't imagine trying to convey emotion by texting. Talk about miscommunicating! Whenever she gets upset and Im around, I MAKE her atleast call him because its just ridiculous over text and it takes too much time!
4) I have made GREAT friends, like I said earlier, because of random blogs and commenting, etc. My prayer is that I will be friends with these people when I actually live in the same city as them. I hope so, because it will make me so sad that I can bust out my heart behind a computer screen, but then not when I am sitting across a starbucks table with them! And same for them.
So blog friends that I have met or haven't met, that I have emailed my life to, or just read you through random people's postings, can we be as good of friends in person as we are on the computer? Cause I think you're all pretty great and I just love you alrady...
I think this is the start of something beautiful ;)
posted by jmjana @ 9:38 AM
3 Comments:
At 1:25 PM,
Anonymous said…
I think that I am pretty much the same online and off. (And that is probably a lie, I am all bark and bark and bark.) The only difference is the amount of emotion I have for people sometimes can't be ... emoted online, only laying on the comfy couch, eating bean dip and reading magazines and not being afraid of the silence. There is much to be said for physical nearness.
At 8:27 AM,
Anonymous said…
I left an anonymous post, but it was by accident. I hit the wrong button. It was the one advising you not to take the horrible apartment. I promise not to do it again.
Although it is quick and economical to communicate by email and online, I find it frustrating because the tone of voice is missing. I have a friend that I always think is yelling at me,( and I don't mean he is using caps) even though he says he isn't. There is something about his style that comes across that way and it is not just me that has noticed.
At 10:16 AM,
jmjana said…
connie,
its ok...i think i can forgive you this one time! just dont let it happen again!
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